A musing on human nature – you, me, us all!
She gave me one look, and with a broad smile gushed “How lovely! The earrings perfectly match your outfit – you look so pretty” 😍 My friend of over 15 years, she has a knack of always finding something nice to say, and compliment people. Such a valuable social skill! Coincidentally a colleague had noticed the same earrings a few days earlier and had commented how they were exactly the same shade of blue as my jacket.
It had been a few months since I had bought the earrings. They were inexpensive – just a casual pick at a local department store while standing in the checkout line. That weekend when I put the earrings on for the first time, one reaction they elicited from a family member was “These are so childish! Where did you get these from?” Later at night I had quietly put them away, wondering if I had made a frivolous purchase – not costly but still a waste of money if I was not going to use the item ever again.
The starkly different reactions of people in my inner circle highlighted the reality of likes and perceptions. What one individual notices and feels can be so very different from another, and if this was within my inner circle what would it be with folks who aren’t as close?
We are constantly being judged by everyone around us – be it on our appearance or on our behavior. Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder – the perceptions that people have about us vary tremendously. Parents, siblings, friends, spouses, children, coworkers, clients, passersby and people watchers – everyone is making an assumption and a decision in their minds. Sometimes it feels like the trapeze artist walking gingerly on a tightrope high above the ground holding a pole in her hands – a balancing act indeed to be our authentic selves and yet cater to all the stakeholders in our life.
A cheer here and a jeer there – like the rise and ebb of the ocean tide. We are actors on the stage of life drawing reactions from our audience. I guess as long as our intentions are good and we perform good “karma” (actions) we can still be perfect with all our imperfections!
~AK Irvinekar
Very beautiful penned Archana.. personalities differ and so do likes and dislikes..I feel what you like is the one that matters most. And it’s not just limiting to choice on accessories, but in life too…easier said than done, but at some point in time we need to move towards that. After all we have just one life
It is definitely easier said than done – and a balance of doing of what one thinks is right vs. group think. And it is also situational, a lot depends on who the audience is!
So glad to be be chatting with you Deepa 💕
Very nicely penned Archana. Love how you take simple incidents in your day to day life and find such deep insights and meaning from it. Liked the comments from readers and echoing them. I often relate to the metaphor of being an actor on the stage of life. This is not only when we experience judgement but also when life brings challenges and we can stay detached from the story that is ever changing. A good reminder to celebrate our purely perfect intentions irrespective of the imperfections that may get projected. Great title and ending to the blog. Keep writing and sharing dear. It is a treat to read your blogs.
Shilpa, your input is so thought-provoking – always! Glad the title and ending resonated with you. Thank you for the encouragement!
So true Archana… judgmental people are very easy to find … they are all around us… cherish the special friend!!!
Your perspective about cherishing our special friend is unique!! Thank you Bhakti 🙂
Archana, I would wear the earrings regardless of what anyone says if you like them.
Absolutely 🙂 Thank you for making the time to read and comment Jeannie!
Nicely reflected Archana! So true – if your heart and intentions are pure and harmless it doesn’t matter what others think. It’s just their perception which changes. Also one should do what makes one’s inner self happy! Kuchh to log kahenge logon ka kam hai kehna:)
What a coincidence – I had thought of this song/these lines too! Appreciate your feedback Padmini!
very true about perceptions. We are judgmental about activities and worser about behaviour. As we are constantly putting people in slots, it becomes very difficult to take forward life. Life appears very complex!
Good read, keep it up
Glad this resonated with you Seema. Appreciate you sharing your thoughts as well!
As long as one is happy n comfortable with what they wear or how they look, nothing else matters!!
Good observation n narration, Archana👌👌👏👏
Appreciate the note Sonia!!
Love the observation! Some of us are more influenced by these comments than others but of course they are all around us given the social nature of our existence!
Thanks Anjutai! I guess feedback is inevitable (on how we present ourselves literally and figuratively), how we react to it is key.
Masta lekh archana apla maan saaf asel intention chan asel tar lokanchi reaction ne kahi farak padat nahi
Thank you Priya! Exactly – barobar muddyacha bolali tu!